So, I live in a house with women whose breath wreaks.
I know, that sounds harsh. Exposing. Terrible.
And it is...but it's truth, I tell ya.
The other day in the car, this kind woman was just...sitting there.
Breathing! It was like I had been gagged in the mouth. Could've
tossed my stomach right then and there.
Crazy-bad...crazy-bad breath.
This morning, I woke up with too little sleep, a crunchy attitude
to say the least, but my nose was working.
I smelled something. Something familiar.
Twas, ...my breath.
So similar! to the aforementioned that I laughed out loud.
Immediately, Luke:
"Why do you look at the speck of sawdust
in your brother's eye
and pay. no. attention.
to the plank
in
your
own
eye?"
I say sorry for my own
and thanks to a God who changes not,
yet continues to gently once-over me.
What disgusts YOU that, at the root of the thing, you find...
traces of your own stinky flesh?
Don't worry, He's on it :)
Wednesday, January 13, 2010
Monday, March 2, 2009
pro-vision.
i want to share the works of the Lord, and not be silent.
for one thing. i started listening to the people and the news about the economy and the this and the that. i started listening to them. and then i started believing them--sure it's happening, but i started believing what they were saying would be true for me. despite God. despite God's ability. despite God's ability to provide for me, His child.
it came to a head when i had to make a decision at work: share & LIVE by faith or keep & don't believe. push comes to shove. or something like that.
i let God lead me (asked His opinion and then did it, the result of it) and while i was letting God lead me, someone left a message on my voicemail telling me there's this lady in california that i've never met--how she had heard of Grace House and what He was doing with it all and how she just was waiting to get on board and what did we need. "ask boldly," the informant encouraged me...she wants to give.
and for two. someone blessed me this week with all this money. immediately when it hit my hands, i sensed God encouraging me to pass it on--in part--to a couple places, to some hands. so i did this. (that is not the miraculous part of the story, nor a self-toot). today, i open my mail and my dear aunt had sent me money wrapped in my favorite recipe she makes. it was far more than what i had given away.
oh dear. how can i keep listening to all the worrying voices regarding the this and the that when the God of my father has always, ALWAYS--
no.
matter.
what.
provided OVER and ABOVE what i needed, really needed! in my life, during my days.
i cannot listen to another. i must listen to Him:
"Do not be afraid, little flock, for your Father
has been pleased to give you the kingdom.
Sell your possessions
and give to the poor.
Provide purses for yourselves
that will not wear out,
a treasure in heaven that will not be exhausted,
where no thief comes near and no moth destroys.
For where your treasure is,
there your heart will be also.
i like Him and His ways are good and righteous. they lead to life.
for one thing. i started listening to the people and the news about the economy and the this and the that. i started listening to them. and then i started believing them--sure it's happening, but i started believing what they were saying would be true for me. despite God. despite God's ability. despite God's ability to provide for me, His child.
it came to a head when i had to make a decision at work: share & LIVE by faith or keep & don't believe. push comes to shove. or something like that.
i let God lead me (asked His opinion and then did it, the result of it) and while i was letting God lead me, someone left a message on my voicemail telling me there's this lady in california that i've never met--how she had heard of Grace House and what He was doing with it all and how she just was waiting to get on board and what did we need. "ask boldly," the informant encouraged me...she wants to give.
and for two. someone blessed me this week with all this money. immediately when it hit my hands, i sensed God encouraging me to pass it on--in part--to a couple places, to some hands. so i did this. (that is not the miraculous part of the story, nor a self-toot). today, i open my mail and my dear aunt had sent me money wrapped in my favorite recipe she makes. it was far more than what i had given away.
oh dear. how can i keep listening to all the worrying voices regarding the this and the that when the God of my father has always, ALWAYS--
no.
matter.
what.
provided OVER and ABOVE what i needed, really needed! in my life, during my days.
i cannot listen to another. i must listen to Him:
"Do not be afraid, little flock, for your Father
has been pleased to give you the kingdom.
Sell your possessions
and give to the poor.
Provide purses for yourselves
that will not wear out,
a treasure in heaven that will not be exhausted,
where no thief comes near and no moth destroys.
For where your treasure is,
there your heart will be also.
i like Him and His ways are good and righteous. they lead to life.
Wednesday, February 11, 2009
Firetruck.
last night i looked after some little girls while their parents were away. when it was time to put them to bed, i was feeling exceptionally weary. i suggested we wait on God together for encouragements or to see what God would like to say to us. the four year old looked at me very matter-of-factly stating, "Miss Beth, I heard FOUR.THINGS." Great! What are they...i replied. "I heard the word FIRETRUCK. (she looks at me with big eyes.) I saw a little girl in her bed, asleep, with stuffed animals. I saw a little boy and he was outside of a house."
Please read the post "My Favorite Things" to see (one of) the miracles in that. (FIRETRUCK) She had no idea what had happened a week prior at a firestation...
When I asked her what she thought these impressions meant from God, she answered, "I think God wants you to pray for the firemen and for the people hurt in the fires. I think with the little girl, God wants you to pray for the sick. For the boy who didn't have a house, I think God wants you to be thankful that you have a house because a lot of people don't."
There is power in being like a child. Lord, lead me there again and again.
This morning, I sat before a woman who walked to the ghetto's upscale McDonalds--such a nice day today in Waco if anyboday wants to move here... :) I sat before her as she described simply and honestly her love hate relationship with alcohol. She told me about how God had snatched her up through the love of people in her life, in her small group community, who look after her and offer her both love and service to her...and give her opportunities to love and serve back.
It was only a couple hours ago that I really felt THRILLED and SHATTERED by what is before us in Grace House. It will be the impossible, but God has already declared that impossible is actually impossible for Him--because He is the God of ABILITY in all things. It will be DELIGHTFUL because what fun is life without redemption, faith, and HOPE. I see this tiny caterpiller wanting out and sharing the struggle of the journey...I see my own slimy wings trying to make it in flight each day--and i trust that this is His business, not mine--I have a part and so do you. We will, as Paul said, "REMEMBER THE POOR"...which to me means "to act with favor" toward our friends in need. And we will, in doing so, remember our own need and look to Jesus to help us.
Isn't this fun?
God is Good and I will be thankful today for that.
Love!
Please read the post "My Favorite Things" to see (one of) the miracles in that. (FIRETRUCK) She had no idea what had happened a week prior at a firestation...
When I asked her what she thought these impressions meant from God, she answered, "I think God wants you to pray for the firemen and for the people hurt in the fires. I think with the little girl, God wants you to pray for the sick. For the boy who didn't have a house, I think God wants you to be thankful that you have a house because a lot of people don't."
There is power in being like a child. Lord, lead me there again and again.
This morning, I sat before a woman who walked to the ghetto's upscale McDonalds--such a nice day today in Waco if anyboday wants to move here... :) I sat before her as she described simply and honestly her love hate relationship with alcohol. She told me about how God had snatched her up through the love of people in her life, in her small group community, who look after her and offer her both love and service to her...and give her opportunities to love and serve back.
It was only a couple hours ago that I really felt THRILLED and SHATTERED by what is before us in Grace House. It will be the impossible, but God has already declared that impossible is actually impossible for Him--because He is the God of ABILITY in all things. It will be DELIGHTFUL because what fun is life without redemption, faith, and HOPE. I see this tiny caterpiller wanting out and sharing the struggle of the journey...I see my own slimy wings trying to make it in flight each day--and i trust that this is His business, not mine--I have a part and so do you. We will, as Paul said, "REMEMBER THE POOR"...which to me means "to act with favor" toward our friends in need. And we will, in doing so, remember our own need and look to Jesus to help us.
Isn't this fun?
God is Good and I will be thankful today for that.
Love!
Wednesday, February 4, 2009
my favorite things.
i love favorites.
favorite color. favorite movie. favorite state fishes.
favorites.
one of my FAAAAVORITE things to do in life is to see Jesus speak to people's hearts when they don't see it comin and in a way that says to the world, "I EXIST! I AM ALIVE! I LOVE TO LOVE PEOPLE!! KNOW ME!!" love to see Him touch people...real life lives.
here's the story. (told to encourage you, not to toot somebody's horn...toot toot)
frances and i were out driving around in the country on sunday because the weather in waco was to.die.for.
we were rockin, rollin and what not--enjoying the sunshine...and we drove by this fire station.
"Frances! THAT is the most gorgeous fire station i have ever seen." (it was. it was green. and new. and SHINY!)
"Yeah, yeah--it is."
52 seconds of silence.
the Holy Spirit who is alive and kickin tugs on me...and i know.
what do i know? i know to ASK...
i, in my head say, "God. Do you want me to go to that station?"
i sense He is saying "YES!"
i ask again, "So. I'm supposed to turn around and go in there. That fire station."
"Yes."
"GOD! You want ME to go THERE and talk to people inside of it."
"Yes."
and then i got convicted inside. and i remembered that the Spirit leads to LIFE. and my flesh leads to death. so i'm all--fine.
"Frances, I think God wants us to go to that station."
in the time it took to turn around and drive back to it, i asked Jesus if there was anything else we needed to know and what.were.we supposed to say to them anyway...
i thank God that He spoke to "pray for the people inside and make sure get them all" or something like that.
now. my brother in law used to be a smoke jumper...and i know who works in a fire station.
big. firestationtype. men.
what are we gonna say to them?!
we walk up and meet a ripped 50 year old man who was politefully dismissive and laughed when we said we heard God say to turn back and come pray for the people inside.
good thing because we asked, "well, is there anyone else here?"
mr. fire station bob was happy to leave us in the garage to gather other humans so that we could pray.
out comes 2 guys and we tell them why we were there and immediately the bigger of the 2 asked, "Where do yall go to church?" we tell him and he says, "SO DO I!! Me and m'wife've been goin there for years now. We're in the Lapes' lifegroup." we're all--weird. because to us, we might as well be in oxville, maine. we laugh and say what are the odds and ask if we can pray.
frances and i were silent for a little bit of time, spoke the words God put on our hearts and hoped to encourage these men.
God is so faithful.
ten minutes or so later, we all look up at each other and both dudes are glad in the face. peaceful. and thank us for coming. the one goes back from where he came after some chivalry and gratitude.
it's then that the remaining fireman informs us of "how cool it is" that we stopped. turns out the man who came out with dark circles under his eyes, obviously needing a touch from his Father, is in the middle of a messy divorce, has 2 young children and has just been cheated on and left by his wife. rough. the things God spoke for him were mostly about God restoring our souls--mind, will, and emotions and about being mended back together again. we asked God to bring this man through the fire and to not let him be burned. we had no idea his life was in such a hard place.
the churchy guy was sooo gracious and i believe was sincerely encouraged that God knew his name and where he lived and that he needed a pick me up...i also think he was blessed to see his possibly ho-hum long days re-canvased into purpose-filled LIVELY times at work.
i invited the dark circles guy to lifegroup before he went away and he said thanks for the invitation.
frances and i left, both really hopeful, for both the guys who might not reeeally know that there is a God who cares for them and really, really SEES them. enough to have 2 b-bopping girls stop by to speak in. ha! on one hand it's so random. and on the other--what, in the kingdom, can be random any longer...we must be available.
i'm driving home tonight and i get this message on my phone.
it's from frances. forwarded by the woman who works at the front desk at our church office...
A fireman came into the office this morning to
talk with a pastor. He offered this information:
His reason for coming to the office was to say "thank you" to the church
for a visit from a couple young ladies who came into the fire dept. recently
because "they felt like they were supposed to". He said the things that
they talked to him about were "right on". He is going through a divorce
(which he did not tell them) and their visit meant a lot to him.
Another significant point to him was that he does
not usually work at that fire station; he just "happened" to be filling
in for someone that day. He normally works at Fire Station 11.
He began to describe who came to visit him. When I asked him if one of
the lady's names was Frances, he said, "Yes, that is it!"
Thus, you are receiving this email. He thought it would be encouraging
to you (and whoever was with you) to know that you were "right on" with
the things that were said to him.
Since he has a friend who goes to our church, he will have someone to
connect with should he decide to attend a service or LG. He left the
office with information about services/lifegroups encouraged by the
outreach of believers here, and a smile on his face.
...
i love Jesus and i love that no matter what anybody says--He is ALIVE
and SPEAKING and CARING for His creation ALL.OVER.THE.EARTH--today...
wonder what He wants to say to you?
certainly kind, encouraging, wonderful words. He thinks. He must feel.
He definitely sees.
bless you today, wherever you may be in the journey.
favorite color. favorite movie. favorite state fishes.
favorites.
one of my FAAAAVORITE things to do in life is to see Jesus speak to people's hearts when they don't see it comin and in a way that says to the world, "I EXIST! I AM ALIVE! I LOVE TO LOVE PEOPLE!! KNOW ME!!" love to see Him touch people...real life lives.
here's the story. (told to encourage you, not to toot somebody's horn...toot toot)
frances and i were out driving around in the country on sunday because the weather in waco was to.die.for.
we were rockin, rollin and what not--enjoying the sunshine...and we drove by this fire station.
"Frances! THAT is the most gorgeous fire station i have ever seen." (it was. it was green. and new. and SHINY!)
"Yeah, yeah--it is."
52 seconds of silence.
the Holy Spirit who is alive and kickin tugs on me...and i know.
what do i know? i know to ASK...
i, in my head say, "God. Do you want me to go to that station?"
i sense He is saying "YES!"
i ask again, "So. I'm supposed to turn around and go in there. That fire station."
"Yes."
"GOD! You want ME to go THERE and talk to people inside of it."
"Yes."
and then i got convicted inside. and i remembered that the Spirit leads to LIFE. and my flesh leads to death. so i'm all--fine.
"Frances, I think God wants us to go to that station."
in the time it took to turn around and drive back to it, i asked Jesus if there was anything else we needed to know and what.were.we supposed to say to them anyway...
i thank God that He spoke to "pray for the people inside and make sure get them all" or something like that.
now. my brother in law used to be a smoke jumper...and i know who works in a fire station.
big. firestationtype. men.
what are we gonna say to them?!
we walk up and meet a ripped 50 year old man who was politefully dismissive and laughed when we said we heard God say to turn back and come pray for the people inside.
good thing because we asked, "well, is there anyone else here?"
mr. fire station bob was happy to leave us in the garage to gather other humans so that we could pray.
out comes 2 guys and we tell them why we were there and immediately the bigger of the 2 asked, "Where do yall go to church?" we tell him and he says, "SO DO I!! Me and m'wife've been goin there for years now. We're in the Lapes' lifegroup." we're all--weird. because to us, we might as well be in oxville, maine. we laugh and say what are the odds and ask if we can pray.
frances and i were silent for a little bit of time, spoke the words God put on our hearts and hoped to encourage these men.
God is so faithful.
ten minutes or so later, we all look up at each other and both dudes are glad in the face. peaceful. and thank us for coming. the one goes back from where he came after some chivalry and gratitude.
it's then that the remaining fireman informs us of "how cool it is" that we stopped. turns out the man who came out with dark circles under his eyes, obviously needing a touch from his Father, is in the middle of a messy divorce, has 2 young children and has just been cheated on and left by his wife. rough. the things God spoke for him were mostly about God restoring our souls--mind, will, and emotions and about being mended back together again. we asked God to bring this man through the fire and to not let him be burned. we had no idea his life was in such a hard place.
the churchy guy was sooo gracious and i believe was sincerely encouraged that God knew his name and where he lived and that he needed a pick me up...i also think he was blessed to see his possibly ho-hum long days re-canvased into purpose-filled LIVELY times at work.
i invited the dark circles guy to lifegroup before he went away and he said thanks for the invitation.
frances and i left, both really hopeful, for both the guys who might not reeeally know that there is a God who cares for them and really, really SEES them. enough to have 2 b-bopping girls stop by to speak in. ha! on one hand it's so random. and on the other--what, in the kingdom, can be random any longer...we must be available.
i'm driving home tonight and i get this message on my phone.
it's from frances. forwarded by the woman who works at the front desk at our church office...
A fireman came into the office this morning to
talk with a pastor. He offered this information:
His reason for coming to the office was to say "thank you" to the church
for a visit from a couple young ladies who came into the fire dept. recently
because "they felt like they were supposed to". He said the things that
they talked to him about were "right on". He is going through a divorce
(which he did not tell them) and their visit meant a lot to him.
Another significant point to him was that he does
not usually work at that fire station; he just "happened" to be filling
in for someone that day. He normally works at Fire Station 11.
He began to describe who came to visit him. When I asked him if one of
the lady's names was Frances, he said, "Yes, that is it!"
Thus, you are receiving this email. He thought it would be encouraging
to you (and whoever was with you) to know that you were "right on" with
the things that were said to him.
Since he has a friend who goes to our church, he will have someone to
connect with should he decide to attend a service or LG. He left the
office with information about services/lifegroups encouraged by the
outreach of believers here, and a smile on his face.
...
i love Jesus and i love that no matter what anybody says--He is ALIVE
and SPEAKING and CARING for His creation ALL.OVER.THE.EARTH--today...
wonder what He wants to say to you?
certainly kind, encouraging, wonderful words. He thinks. He must feel.
He definitely sees.
bless you today, wherever you may be in the journey.
Tuesday, February 3, 2009
here i am.
I can remember watching Hook, the film, and loving when it gets to the part when one of the Lost Boys smooshes around Robin Williams' face searching for him inside the cheeks and the expression. "THERE you are, Peter..." augh! Such a sweet moment of re-discovery. Discovery.
Well, that's how I've felt about myself and things over the last few months. Though I may appear silent to you all, I have been asking, searching, discovering over and over again what is behind my own skin. In all my searching through what has been deposited into me along the way...a little bit of Asia, a lot more understanding of God's heart for the poor & oppressed, perhaps too much about how weak I am--my resulting statement is this: I hope not to look in the mirror of all I've seen and known, walk away, and forget. (James 1.23 to 25, a real zinger...)
These months away have served to be the gift of my adult life, life in ministry, and life in God. Though so difficult at times, necessary.
Today (and for a couple months now) I wanted to tell you, "Here I am!" And let you know that I'm still thankful. Still alive. And still searching. When I say searching I mean--lots of things. But the searching will soon come to action--faith in motion, as Grace House is soon to open it's doors (in faith). Unless God speaks to wait or something, we plan to start taking women in sometime in March. We are on our way, all of us.
I'm certain I'll share more about the time in Hong Kong with all those brothers. For now I need to restrict doing that, in one swooping chunk...only because I know how you feel about those long emails and well, all those words, emotions, and experiences just would not fit.
I am excited. Expectant. Encouraged. And totally unprepared for what is to come. But alas! He makes all things new and I realize that He equips those He calls. I can trust Him for that one. Bless you and thank you in every way.
More soon.
Do you like this blog? I think it's weirder than email...but maybe it's a meeting place...near Mars.
With love of course,
beth
Well, that's how I've felt about myself and things over the last few months. Though I may appear silent to you all, I have been asking, searching, discovering over and over again what is behind my own skin. In all my searching through what has been deposited into me along the way...a little bit of Asia, a lot more understanding of God's heart for the poor & oppressed, perhaps too much about how weak I am--my resulting statement is this: I hope not to look in the mirror of all I've seen and known, walk away, and forget. (James 1.23 to 25, a real zinger...)
These months away have served to be the gift of my adult life, life in ministry, and life in God. Though so difficult at times, necessary.
Today (and for a couple months now) I wanted to tell you, "Here I am!" And let you know that I'm still thankful. Still alive. And still searching. When I say searching I mean--lots of things. But the searching will soon come to action--faith in motion, as Grace House is soon to open it's doors (in faith). Unless God speaks to wait or something, we plan to start taking women in sometime in March. We are on our way, all of us.
I'm certain I'll share more about the time in Hong Kong with all those brothers. For now I need to restrict doing that, in one swooping chunk...only because I know how you feel about those long emails and well, all those words, emotions, and experiences just would not fit.
I am excited. Expectant. Encouraged. And totally unprepared for what is to come. But alas! He makes all things new and I realize that He equips those He calls. I can trust Him for that one. Bless you and thank you in every way.
More soon.
Do you like this blog? I think it's weirder than email...but maybe it's a meeting place...near Mars.
With love of course,
beth
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